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Bonjour Trissa-tesse - click opera
February 2010
 
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Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 07:12 am
Bonjour Trissa-tesse

A couple of weeks ago, citing Metabolist architect Kiyonori Kikutake's idea that "a Japanese room is determined by information, whereas a Western room relies on objects", I informed the world rather grandly that "my new apartment in Neukolln is going to be very "Japanese" in that sense: a corridor and two rooms stuffed to the gullet with information".

Now comes the pleasant moment when I have to design that. I don't yet have the information in the apartment (it's still very much a white shell, while the information -- in the form of books, CDs, records, magazines -- lies in various storage locations), but I have made a decision on the practicalities of the "stuffing to the gullet" bit. In a stunningly hypocritical reversal after my many condemnations of pluricide, I've resorted to a solution provided by the world's most monocultural furniture outlet, Ikea. I've started buying flatpacked Trissas, and I will fill my whole apartment with these stackable Trissas, which are sold as 12" LP crates, but can be turned into just about anything; a table, a shelving unit, storage boxes, lighting housing...



This might be the moment to repeat a black little joke I was telling as part of my unreliable tour of the Whitney. In the Steven Parrino room I announced: "There's bad news and good news in this room. The bad news is that the artist unfortunately passed away last year. The good news is that Ikea are making some of his three-dimensional works available as flatpacks. Of course, they've been given new names for the Ikea range. This one is called Svendqvist, and that one is Nordstam."

The last laugh, of course, belongs to Ikea. Assembling these flatpack Trissas has stripped the skin off my fingers and given me blisters... signed with a loving kiss, straight from the heart of the monoculture.

34CommentReplyShare

intergalactim
intergalactim
intergalactim
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 05:22 am (UTC)

i thought you had been told by Abake how to make the perfect book-shelf?
(ikea doesn't seem like relational design, or maybe it's at a just larger scale).

ikea has yet to make it's way to NZ, but is slowly appearing in homes thanks to people's Australian holidays...


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intergalactim
intergalactim
intergalactim
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 05:24 am (UTC)

PS if those shelves on the table were full, they might over balance the trestles (kinda bothers me).


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gillen
gillen
the ill-tempered cavalier
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 05:23 am (UTC)

Ikea


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imomus
imomus
imomus
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 05:40 am (UTC)

That's an outtake from Marxy's album, isn't it?


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cityramica
cityramica
cityramica
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 05:26 am (UTC)

you should ger some floating bookshelves:::


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bopscotch
bopscotch
bopscotch
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 05:39 am (UTC)

I'd need several. Maybe even more.


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bopscotch
bopscotch
bopscotch
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 05:42 am (UTC)

So wait a second - since my room is taken up mostly by books, CDs, magazines and records, my room is in turn Japanese?


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cheapsurrealist
cheapsurrealist
Dave Nold
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 06:36 am (UTC)

Nice floors.

That sound stick looks a bit precarious.

And I had no idea you were a double amputee.


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(Anonymous)
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 06:49 am (UTC)

Nice floor, but they really skimp on the skirting boards in Central Europe, don't they? Ikea gear is a very short-term investment - don't you have anyone who will inherit your stuff?


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thisisforreal
no
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 06:50 am (UTC)

sharp fellow i wish
you well with new abode now
finish unpacking


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(Anonymous)
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 12:58 pm (UTC)

Is your avatar related to Fred West?


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cap_scaleman
cap_scaleman
cap_scaleman
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 09:07 am (UTC)

Hey, I thought you DIDN'T watch TV!

By the way, you just HAVE to give us a "tour de inventions". That thing to the right of the picture looks really neat with that yellow lamp on top!


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meganfinley
meganfinley
meganruthfinley
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 10:26 am (UTC)
Something interesting to say....I hope.

Your decor goes with anything- it leaves the possibilities wide open!
I was surprised to find when I moved to EU a few years ago that people don't have a very good opinion of IKEA there- percieved as generic or something, whereas in America they are well-off suburban and somewhat suburban. Of course now I live an hour from Nashville, Tennessee- IKEA is fancy designer stuff! You couldn't ask for more American nostalgia. Charming pictures of the kindergarden. Congrats on the housewarming- I hope you're fingers heal soon. They must have antibiotic cremes and bandages by some GMBH there...as for the media/information-what about wine crates and drawers hung on the walls? Collections of items can look like art that way- a giant ribbon pattern on one wall like a bulliten board to tuck flat things under. Hey! I think I'll try that in my own room...
:)


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(Anonymous)
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 11:38 am (UTC)


I remember how impressive Michael Landy's flat in Fashion St was when I visited, divided up by colourful plastic crates he had cast up for one of his installations ... tried to find some pics but I couldn't.

I prefer a more minimalist stance myself. "Stuffed to the gullet" cleanly translates as "more to dust" to my mind.


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jmathewes
Jocelyn Mathewes
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 04:22 pm (UTC)

I don't know if Ikea is having the last laugh. If you're making use of one of their pieces of furniture in a creative way (using it for anything you deem it useful for), then it's the same as if you went to a thrift store and bought a bunch of crates. You conquer the monoculture by not buying the matching set of whatever that goes with the crates.

I've had a lot of coffee, so I might not be making sense.


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(Anonymous)
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 07:18 pm (UTC)

Were you trying to sober up from something?


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unluckymonkey
unluckymonkey
unluckymonkey
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 05:01 pm (UTC)

If only you would have been kneeling on a pair of shoes the Don Knots moment would have been complete.


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bklyndispatch
bklyndispatch
in exile
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 05:40 pm (UTC)

i like the idea of a room determined by information, but aren't books and magazines a little old fashioned?


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(Anonymous)
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 06:17 pm (UTC)

why not milk crates? they're a hundred times sturdier, free, and give your room a DIY sassiness rather than a composite-board-and-white-paint genericness. spend a few hours scrounging around behind delis and grocery stores and you'll be set.


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(Anonymous)
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 07:19 pm (UTC)

Plus they don't need to be assembled. It must just be your middle-class sensibilities getting the better of you (new flat = must go to Ikea).


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rob.rabiee.myopenid.com
rob.rabiee.myopenid.com
Sun, Jul. 9th, 2006 09:26 pm (UTC)

I've only shopped at Ikea once, and I was nearly devoured by the big red beanbag chair...whateveritscalled. A very nice, very pretty clerk explained to me the best way to extricate oneself from the whateveritscalled, and I did. I guess I looked a little frazzled, so she asked me what was wrong. And I mumbled, with apparently a crazed look in my eyes, "This furniture tried to eat me and everything has a monster's name."

And that's how I feel about Ikea today. Its furniture tried to devour my body and soul, and I canimagine their names in some lost Old English epic poem. So right now, I will begin composing my follow-up to "Beowulf": "Grankulla, The Terrible"! (http://www.ikea.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?topcategoryId=15585&catalogId=10103&storeId=12&productId=33218&langId=-1&categoryId=16110&chosenPartNumber=20058882)


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imomus
imomus
imomus
Mon, Jul. 10th, 2006 07:44 am (UTC)

Grankulla, The Terrible!

Hmm, I think he needs a bit of prosthetic work. People are going to laugh every time he appears on screen, no matter how menacing the music is.


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