September 2nd, 2006


Entropy cotton

You go into a clothes shop and pull open some T-shirts to look at the designs. But when you try to put them back on the shelf, you simply can't achieve the necessary level of folding perfection. You make pathetic attempts to smooth rumples and tuck in sleeves, but it seems your level of personal culture is inadequate. This is something you weren't taught at school or university. It's something you will never learn. "Just leave it, we'll fix that," says the sales assistant with a kindly smile that doesn't quite hide some shade of supercilious pity, exasperation and derision. You exit the shop apologetically, leaving a crumpled mess of "entropy cotton" behind you.

Well, thanks to Japanese YouTube select site Qooqle Video Clippers I have found a way never again to be that inadequate loser. With this instructional video on how to fold T-shirts, not only will you be able to hold your head high on your next visit to Graniph, you'll be able to turn your own bedroom into something almost as beautiful.

Who'd have thought folding T-shirts was so simple? There it is on the screen! The "magic point" you simply have to pinch for everything to fall into place using only the force of gravity! Mastery of the Second Law of Thermodynamics can be yours! All you have to do is watch a 22-second video!

Except... I can't do it. No matter how many times I watch this incredibly simple video, I can't make the shirt fall into the neat oblong shape the expert gets. And why are there two edits, at the six and thirteen second marks? Is this just another internet conspiracy? Or simply confirmation of the weary thesis of the Resistentialists; things really are against us.